learning through adventures
Drive anywhere in France during the summer and you’re pretty much guaranteed to see posters advertising a local brocante. But, what are brocantes? The word brocantes comes from the French verb “brocanter” which means “to deal in second-hand goods”. They’re not your usual carboot sale […]
Home schooling, world schooling, home educating, unschooling, road schooling, wildschooling…whatever you call it, whichever one you identify with… they all have one thing in common. The children aren’t registered in a traditional school and as such, the parents are responsible for their child’s education. The […]
Do you ever feel like you’ve spent the day rushing, nagging, hurrying and despite it all wonder why no-one is listening?! I do!
When I ask my three year old to do something, I get so worried about whether he’s listening to me and doing as I ask that I barely even consider that he might be doing something. Why can’t he just stop what he’s doing and do what I’m asking him to do instead!
This evening I was rushing him home from our walk as it was nearly time for bed. “I’ll count to ten…” I said…getting impatient as his little brother started fidgeting in my arms. I resisted the urge to call him again and walked over to see what he was doing. “I’m trying to save that worm” he pointed as it wriggled in a puddle of water. “I don’t think worms can swim” he added thoughtfully. We helped it out together and walked home happily, talking about how pleased the worm must have been that he came along!
It got me thinking…how many times a day do I rush my children? My husband’s always reminding me to stop doing everything so quickly. To relax and leave the kids as they are if they’re happy. But, it’s so difficult! I’m one of the many parents that’s been ‘trained’ to achieve, conditioned to have to have everything ‘just so ‘…sometimes we’re so busy striving for the perfect life that we’ve missed the perfect moments. Those perfect little moments that will make us smile long after our kids have left home.
My children have such beautiful imaginations. Everything is an adventure! I want to go on their adventures with them. I want them to see me laugh with them at the butterflies chasing each other through the meadow. I want us to tumble together down the grassy slopes. I want us to spend the morning splashing in puddles and the afternoon telling silly stories. I don’t want to be the one to teach them that being a grown-up means ignoring beauty, joy and wonder. I don’t want to be a parent that worries whether other people think I’m too soft or that they aren’t ‘obedient’ enough. I want them to be free to explore, wonder, fidget, splash, practice, stare, play, imagine…with me by their side.
There’s definitely a place for routine when it comes to raising happy kids but there’s also a place for going with the flow! Do they really need to stop running around the garden in their underwear and get dressed right now? Can’t they stay out to play just a little longer? Can dinner not wait 5 more minutes so they can finish their game? Does bathtime have to happen at exactly 6pm on such a beautiful evening? Maybe we should ask ourselves whether what we’re asking is truly important or whether we just want to be obeyed. Whether we’re dragging them from one place to another with no consideration for what they want. Each seamingly small request we make interrupting their precious imagination and curiosity. Imaginations and curiosities that we should be encouraging.
So, next time I’m tempted to start counting to ten…I’ll remind myself to slow down…and ask them what their doing…I can guarantee that it’ll be more fun than being a ‘grown-up’!
Amy
xxx
This post is inspired by a post by Leah from Your Natural Learner and my little explorers Leo (age 3) and Sebastien (16 months).
Advice and Resources to Help Keep Kids Safe Online During my ten years as a Health Education Advisor, I often heard parents and teachers say that they couldn’t keep their kids safe online because they didn’t understand enough about the Internet themselves. I’m here to […]
Do you need anything special for a home-birth? So, you’ve decided you want a home birth but you’re not sure where to start!? Getting hold of few home birth essentials will help to ensure that things run smoothly. But, that doesn’t mean you need to […]
The thought of a home birth filled me with horror when it was suggested during my first pregnancy. I googled ‘home birth stories’ a few times and decided to opt for a hospital birth. However, following a traumatic 45 minute labour in our local hospital, I was advised to opt for a home birth if I had anymore babies. When a home birth was suggested during my second pregnancy…I didn’t hesitate.
My hospital experience was terrible! Please don’t freak out if you’re planning a hospital birth as I know loads of people who rave about theirs! Blame a bank -holiday, change-over time baby who decided to arrive in 45 minutes! Anyway, whatever it was it was enough to make me realise that I’d be more relaxed at home! Plus, with the hospital 30 minutes away in the car a home birth kinda seemed like the safest option! I nearly had baby 1 in the car when the midwife sent us home as I ‘wasn’t in labour’…I didn’t want to risk that again! Another big reason I choose a home birth was my toddler, Leo. He would be a few months under two when his ‘bestest brother’ was due to arrive. I was soooo anxious about leaving him home (he was still breastfeeding to sleep and during the night A LOT until I weaned him at 28 months!) He still seemed so tiny and I didn’t want to leave him.
Having Sebastien at home was magical (as magical as pushing out a nearly 9lb’er can be) It all ran totally smoothly…aside from the fact that the midwife only just made it (as they’d had a record 3 births in 24 hours!)
We’d prepared the spare room a few weeks in advance and decided against a water birth as it seemed a little awkward with a toddler around! I felt really good knowing that I had control over how the room was set up (find out how we got ready for my home birth here!). Every so often I would walk into the room and imagine holding our new baby in my arms.
I went to bed as usual on the evening of the 5th February. I wasn’t expecting much sleep as I was massive and not far off my due date. I started having contractions at around midnight (my bodies weird version of them anyway!) I was uncomfortable and getting in and out of bed a lot. That woke our cosleeping toddler who got really upset that I wasn’t laying next to him. After trying but failing to settle him in bed we decided we’d try a different tactic…we woke him up to play! (a year on and I think he’d sleep through it now!) It worked and he played happily with the new cars I’d bought him in preparation.
When we finalised our plans for a home birth we couldn’t decide where our toddler would be happiest when I went into labour! I’d read home birth stories where the child watched (no thanks!); home birth stories where the partner has the kids (I didn’t want to be on my own!); home birth stories where the children went to someone’s house (getting closer!) and home birth stores where someone came to your house (💙 this). We had a bag packed for him just incase he needed to go anywhere but as it turned out he didn’t. My parents were called and came over to watch him for us. They don’t live far away so it didn’t take long. I paced the kitchen muttering expletives and vowing never to have any more children while Leo played happily in the lounge.
When my contractions started getting really close together I was slightly concerned as the midwife still hadn’t arrived. My husband called for an update and we were advised to go up to hospital if no-one arrived soon. I’m still not entirely sure how that would have happened as we live 20 miles from the hospital! Thankfully the midwife arrived and we went upstairs. Ten minutes later and our baby Sebastién was born!
Apparently, we were unlucky that our designated midwife was at another birth which is why we had to wait for a midwife to get to us from 30 miles away. I actually think we were really lucky as the midwives who came were amazing! I felt so relaxed. When I had my first baby I had no idea what my body was doing. I thought I was in labour but I was told I wasn’t. I wanted to push but was told I was doing out wrong. My home birth experience was the polar opposite! I was relaxed, I was told to listen to my body…the midwife stayed out of it to be honest! She didn’t poke and prod me as they’d done in hospital…she watched me and told me to trust by instincts.
I had a few stitches afterwards which was predicted as I’d torn badly first time round. Then we walked downstairs to introduce Sebastién to his big brother who was still playing happily. We sat on our sofa and cuddled our boys. No cramped hospital beds. No ringing a bell to ask for water. We were home.
So, I’m asuming that you’re still here because you’re tempted by a home birth?! Choosing where to give birth is a really personal choice…I don’t want to make that decision for you. What I can do is tell you a few reasons why it worked for us…
Our baby boy, Sebastien fed instantly. He laid on me while I had some stitches. Then, I walked downstairs and made the midwives a cup of tea!
With all this said, the most important thing is that mum and baby are safe. So, however you choose to welcome your little one into the world…I wish you the best of luck 😘
Amy
xxx
Let’s start by agreeing that being a parent is really hardwork! It can also be really good fun! I was an Early Years teacher from the age of 21 and I worked in Education for 10 years before having my first child…but having Leo made […]
Leo had this cute Lego travel tin for his third birthday…he loves superheroes! It’s also the perfect way to introduce him to small Lego! It’s really handy for playing with at the kitchen table (away from his little brother) and taking away on holiday […]